December 26, 2007

age: 16

location: bedroom

They never call. Even when you end the conversation with “call me” and they respond “definitely”, they still never call. Oh, it kills me that he said definitely. That denotes an absolute. I guess, what are words really but either truths or lies and no way of telling which is which.

age: 27

location: Paris

I associate happiness with electronic music. I do not cut myself to feel or throw my emotions into artistry or push myself through some physical activity that overbears any internal emotion. I drunkenly dance to DJs in bars and surround myself with others doing the same. We come together, we take off our clothes, we consume alcohol. We become friends, animalistic but not beastly. It is a happiness that does not need to prove itself through a smile.

Dressing in neon, the lights flash throughout the club as I vent through movement. A contrast is created of pitch black and a bright stream of light. Come to think of it, I find that the direction of humanity was solidified when artificial light was created. No longer did we have to follow what was natural. We could do as much as we created.


December 6, 2007

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SPACE 1026 – check it out. I love this idea of an art collective, where creating is done through collaboration. As a writer, this usually isn’t the case. The other day, I read a interesting quote by Elton John about how the internet is actually isolating and hindering an artist. He says,

“The internet has stopped people from going out and being with each other, creating stuff. Instead they sit at home and make their own records, which is sometimes OK but it doesn’t bode well for long-term artistic vision. Hopefully the next movement in music will tear down the internet. Let’s get out in the streets and march and protest instead of sitting at home and blogging. I do think it would be an incredible experiment to shut down the whole internet for five years and see what sort of art is produced over that span.”

Hypocritcal of me to say so but I kinda agree.

December 3, 2007

age: 32

location: New York City

I don’t think paying your bills gets you into heaven because I never paid mine. I left my mortgage payment and my credit card debt on my kitchen table when I was grabbed by my bare arm and pulled into a New York alley where men raped me of my consciousness and didn’t stop at anything else.

And in that moment when I realized my last breaths were surfacing in my lungs, and I was on the verge of entering either a black abyss or some sort of afterlife, I started panicking about the unpaid bills on the table. Good thing the golden gates open to those with poor money management.

I felt an immense amount of relief, as if I had been skin and bones starving in the desert and then came upon crisp water and floating around in it, were big salmon. I had died and gone to heaven.

There wasn’t a line. Or a day of judgment but there was oh so much silence. We walk on clouds up here, so whether tiptoeing or stomping, footsteps are muted. New York was it for me – always buzzing, honking, whistling. I need so much more than to live in the presence of others. I need to hear it knocking at my door or breathing down my neck.

Many days, I would nomadically search for noise, wandering amongst the stark, naked, and natural bodies. We are absent of clothes and somehow, absent of lust. We are absent of argument and opinion. We are absent of clatter and petty insults and cries that last all night we end up with a damp pillow in the morning.

I don’t know what I did to deserve this. I guess Jesus has high expectations. Everyday, I’m forced to awake and stare into the depths of Hell, while everyone walks around with no fuckin’ idea


December 1, 2007

As an activist, I have always questioned how to be the most effective protester, and I have found that the answer is fairly simple: boycott. If we want people to listen to our argument, we must make that argument economical.

Any issue we fight for usually exists because someone profits from it. Therefore, if we rid them of this profit, we usually can get rid of the issue as well.

For example, if we want a greener world, we should boycott airplanes, gas-guzzlers, and food shipped from halfway around the world. If we want to create better working conditions for children and stop them from working at all, we should boycott companies that buy products from a sweatshop.

Boycott magazines portraying skinny models to further acceptance of body image. Boycott the Olympics in China to pressure their government to stop aiding the genocide in Darfur. Boycott meat to create better conditions for animals.

Secondly, tell them that you are doing so. Boycotting will not be as effective if the source of the problem does not know they are losing profit from your protest.

I just do not think it is reasonable to ask other people to sacrifice in order to do what is just if we are not willing to sacrifice as well.